Joaquín Sabina, the Spanish singer, has a verse that says: “For saying what I think, without thinking what I say, they gave me more than one kiss and more than one slap”.
Today’s society encourages people not to repress their feelings and to be open to sharing them whenever possible. There are theories, for example, that explain the higher rate of male suicides in the difficulty of opening up to others.
Thus, in general, we can affirm that expressing emotions is positive, as Standford University demonstrated when it showed how blood pressure increased in a group forced to repress their emotions (https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2003-02341-008).
So, let’s open up and show the world our emotional inner selves.
No, that is not the way.
Expressing how one feels depends on 3 elements that must be in favour:
The moment, which must invite to be heard and hold one’s attention.
The receiver, who must be open, able to listen and have something to contribute.
The content, which must be relevant and morally acceptable to the receiver.
If one of the 3 is not right, opening up can be disastrous. Have you seen “First Dates”?
If any of these elements fail you, I recommend two things:
1. Seek out a professional psychotherapist.
2. Write down how you feel, something that is comforting and proven in this study: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1467-9280.1997.tb00403.x